fat free yoghurt
With a spoonful of red jam
stomach ache
© Rachel Green July 2026
I’m offered a free costume
to try out and review
an adult pirate's costume.
It might be okay for kids
to dress up as the bad guys:
I've seen young Darth Vaders,
vampires, werewolves;
supervillains were the rage when I was a kid:
Harley Quinn, The Joker and so on,
but as an adult? No.
There's nothing romantic about pirates:
bloodthirsty bastards who would cut your throat
for the small change in your pocket.
If I wanted to be a pirate
I'd just wait outside Sainsburys
and stab the first person with a full trolley
and take off in their Volvo estate.
© Rachel Green July 2026






