The Accidental Marriage...

The Accidental Marriage, and Deliberate Damnation, of Anthony Fletcher

Anthony Fletcher
in a mockery of sudden misunderstandings
signed his name on the wrong line
and found himself
not an usher, but a groom.

His new wife Jane,
ten years his elder yet a teenager herself,
said “I’m not marrying your spotty brother!”
which was unfair
because Anthony washed with Germaway soap
and petroleum
and only had a few spots
on his chin.

“Well,” he said,
“I don’t want to be married
to my smelly brother’s stinky girlfriend”
Which was also unfair
because Jane had washed last month.

“Now now,”
said the vicar,
“I have a solution,”
and he excommunicated
young Anthony.

The world went a peculiar shade of grey.
His marriage dissolved.
His Catholicism unconfirmed.
His baptism voided.

“What happened?” he said
but nobody heard him.
He tried shouting.
“Was that the wind?” somebody said.
He screamed.
“I can hear the trees,” said somebody else.
He cursed God
a man appeared
in a white cotton jacket
and herringbone slacks
and two tiny horns.

“Hello Anthony,” he said
“Shall we be friends?”
And he took Anthony’s hand
and bought ice-creams
from the van across the road from the church.