17th November 2019

heavy rain
the cat, soaked to the skin
seeking birds

© Rachel Green 2019

Guilt and Regret
22.

Trickster
my little girl
not quite fourteen
half blind, half-deaf
neurotic and nervous
barking at everything
and scratching,
scratching,
crying,
suffering with a permanent UTI.
But she still loved walks
and eating her dinner
and scratches on the back
and tummy rubs.
Was I right to put her to sleep
or was I selfish?
It's not like the others.
She wasn't grateful for the rest
but fought every step of the way.
Twice the dosage of soperific,
twice the dosage of pentobarbital
until her eyes glaze
and her tongue slips out
from her underbite.
Goodbye, my darling girl.
I will always feel guilty for killing you.

© Rachel Green 2019