Gula
I eat when I'm
depressed
it gives me a moment of
solace
when I can think about
joy
the pleasure of eating;
the pleasure of taste
then the guilt
and the weight gain
which brings depression
again.
I used to be active
dropped all the weight
I'd put on
developed muscles where
I never had before
fighting fit, as they
say,
but money became
scarcer
and criticism was
levelled
at old ladies beating
young girls
for beribboned golden
brass
so I gave up
because it hurt too
much
inside.
I wish I could smoke
again.
A filthy habit
but it stopped me
eating
I used to be thin.
My kingdom for a smoke
but I don't have a
kingdom
just a black, black
dog.
2 comments:
*hugs*
Well done.
Though I have never been "fighting fit" I feel this keenly. I'd love to smoke again (and be thin again). Ageism is a bitch of a thing.
It is. Still... new diet.
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